"Old Long Since" or "Long, long ago" carry the old memories into the new year...

Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And days of auld lang syne?

And days of auld lang syne, my dear,
And days of auld lang syne.
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And days of auld lang syne?

We twa hae run aboot the braes
And pu'd the gowans fine.
We've wandered mony a weary foot,
Sin' auld lang syne.

Sin' auld lang syne, my dear,
Sin' auld lang syne,
We've wandered mony a weary foot,
Sin' auld ang syne.

We twa hae sported i' the burn,
From morning sun till dine,
But seas between us braid hae roared
Sin' auld lang syne.

Sin' auld lang syne, my dear,
Sin' auld lang syne.
But seas between us braid hae roared
Sin' auld lang syne.

And ther's a hand, my trusty friend,
And gie's a hand o' thine;
We'll tak' a cup o' kindness yet,
For auld lang syne.

For auld lang syne, my dear,
For auld lang syne,
We'll tak' a cup o' kindness yet,
For auld lang syne.

Tonight, I'm really missing my mom.

Oh, the roller-coasterness of grief. Today I just got so sad. I wanted to just call up mom and visit and revisit about the same ol' things we used to. I wanted to complain that my foot and leg really hurt just to hear her utter the same words she has for years, "You'll be, okay, Ellie. Keep you chin up. We've all gone through a lot worse." Yep, we have( how much worse can it be than going through your first Christmas without your mother?). And even though I know all these things, I'd just like to hear these words uttered from her mouth... because her reassurance always meant it was so. And it hurts so much knowing that I can't ever hear her voice just one more time. Yet I know her life was long and complete and her final days...those final hours...were so difficult and she is at peace. Now we can only let that seed of "it will be okay" grow inside of us. She planted those seeds in all her children and grand children. I've cried a good part of the evening, and can only brush away my tears with the same strength she did her own.

My 2 Buddies!

Bye Bye

Jo Jo. Thanks for coming up for Christmas. It's been wonderful having you and Chuck up to visit. I thoroughly enjoyed our visits, our present opening, our yummy dinner ect. I'm glad you had some time today with Megs. Thanks for all your help while my trimmed hoof is healing, and especially when Chuck faced his fears. Sometimes life is like a big dog that's ready to eat your green choker, we just have to find the courage to stand up and not back down. We can all learn so much from that baby dragon.
Drive safely and let's keep talking about a reunion of some sorts!

Post-surgery Visitors:

It gets pretty boring sitting here...keeping my foot up. I help pass the time by playing Flip Words, reading the paper, doing crossword puzzles and reading blogs. Every once in a while I get some company, and this really helps! Here is TT when she comes up to give me loves...she purrrrs in my ear and lets me snuggle. She doesn't even mind I have no makeup on and my hair is up in a dump dolly do!
And here is my Guest of Honor! Chuck sits here with me and we just yack up a storm.

He wanted to show me his choker that Santa brought him. He loves it because it is green and begged me not to eat it because he couldn't dare see Santa disappear in my mouth!

Oh Chuck, you've really helped my post-surgery time pass and have helped me so much! I love you and I really love the fact that you always say what is on your mind, in spite of your loppy lip!

My, Oh My!

My watch dog...making sure he is the only one that gets my attention...

My "boot".

My supper tonight...



My helper...

My oowwiieee toes!

Theo's first Christmas!

This is the Santa outfit I got Theo for Christmas. It looks much like the one I had (still have) when I was a baby. Look how dang cute his smile is!
You can't see it, but he has one swirly curl on the left side of his head. (megs had 2, on one each side.)
I love the little black booties that are sewn into these jammies.
There is a sweet love between Theo and their dog!

The best gift of all

was the reaction my kids had to their "homemade" gift. I made each received a photo album. The pictures included were all the old ones :

1. A section of their own baby pics from birth to when they left home.
2. Pictures of my immediate family growing up.
3. Pictures of my parents wedding and old pics of them when they were younger.
4. Pictures of my grand parents and their obituaries.
   
5. Pictures of all 3 kids together, growing up.
6. A CD of each sibling' pics from birth to leaving home.
7. A CD of their own album, in case they wanted to make copies.
8. Room for more pics!

I've been wanting to blog about this project I started, but couldn't because they (Ed, Michelle and Megan) read my blog and I didn't want to spoil the surprise. The process was an incredible emotional journey from start to finish.

The kids knew they were getting something homemade, like an embroidered towel or something...(which does hold a lot of meaning in of itself) but they had no clue about this present much less the magnitude.

It touched their hearts, tears welt up as they thumbed through them... just as it did to me when I was making them. It stopped them dead in their tracks...they still had their BIG present to open...yet they wanted to just look at all those childhood memories, then they wanted to look at each others'!

We all got lots of stuff for Christmas, we loved all the decorating, writing/sending Christmas cards, cooking a wonderful dinner (thanks Megs and JO!) , wrapping/unwrapping, and everything else that surrounds the holiday season. However, making that heart-to-heart connection with each of my kids...reading their faces exactly what I had hoped was indeed the best gift of all.

Although it's been said many times, many ways:

to you.

Today is Christmas Eve!

Normally I would be doing last minute shopping...getting cards and envelopes together so I can get them in the mail. Finishing all the last minute stuff...but with having to keep a leg up above my heart, it's a little more difficult! I am able to scoot around pretty dang good... thanks Dick and Carol for loaning me big grampa's walker! So I guess I can just write a list and the last minute details can be finished by those around me-- Woohoo! Sounds like a splendid idea to me!

Tonight I plan on making my traditional Christmas Eve green chili served with grated cheddar, tortilla chips and wassail. (I think I started that with my kids when we lived in South Dakota, either that or my first year of teaching in Lander.) It makes a nice warm, tastey meal the night before the big feast! Things were much different when the kids were real little. I was a single mom in college, and basically broke. I had to come up with other creative ways to make our holidays seems very special! So we did. Christmas came early. We'd celebrate my birthday by letting the kids open their Christmas presents that day! (18th) I know that is naughty, but so good! They still want that to be a tradition and ask to open presents on my birthday. Growing up, we opened them on Christmas Eve because my dad was so excited, he couldn't wait for us to open our presents. And each year, the neighbor kids would get in trouble for asking to open their presents early AGAIN. lol As kids, we'd wake the next morning to play with our gifts from Santa and the smell of the turkey in the turkey roaster. My kids would have their SANTA presents to unwrap on Christmas day.


Here are some historical Christmas Eve traditions. Mostly I just remember the traditional feelings that would come around Christmas. It's the most wonderful time of the year! And the music! That's awesome too!

I will leave you with a new twist on an old song. We sang THE 12 GROOVY DAYS OF CHRISTMAS at my Winter Concert. (arrg. and new words by Greg Gilpin) This isn't us, obviously, but many of the actions and clothes are quite similar! I also added The Hustle in part of it and after "an 8-track by the Partridge Family" some of the girls screamed DAVID CASSIDY!

Enjoy and Merry Christmas Eve traditions to you and yours!

Cards are done!

...well, most of them anyway. They will be received after Christmas, but that's okay...
Got Rubye's package ready to be taped to mail. Buggy, there is a card in there for you and a present from your goofy cousins!
Got Ed's present wrapped and the last of the other gifts...

It's about time for YOU KNOW WHO to show up at the door...err...I mean down the chimney!

The surgery went fine

AND we all found out I have an incredibly low tolerance to the anaesthetics and the numbing meds they used on me. My foot is still numb...36 hours after the shot! However, my arse is getting sick of sitting here on this recliner and I can only play so many games of flip words!

*sigh*

December 20th:

My husband turns 46.
I have foot surgery (now I'm getting nervous about it).
2 days before Christmas Break for the rest of my school.
5 Days before Christmas.
5 Days to get my Christmas cards done.
5 Days to get Rubye's package wrapped and sent!

F is for

FALLEN ARCHES
OVER THE HILL
RAISING EYE-BROWS
TRYING TO STAY YOUNG
YESTERDAY'S MEMORIES

FAMILY
OPEN PRESENTS
UNDER WHERE?
RED HEAD

Dear Ellie...

(LOOKS LIKE A CARD MOMMA WOULD PICK FOR ME!)

the 18th is my birthday, the 20th is scott's

and here's what I'm having done...
f the joint that connects your big toe to your foot has a swollen, sore bump, you may have a bunion.

More than half the women in America have bunions, a common deformity often blamed on wearing tight, narrow shoes, and high heels. Bunions may occur in families, but many are from wearing tight shoes. Nine out of ten bunions happen to women. Nine out of ten women wear shoes that are too small.

Too-tight shoes can also cause other disabling foot problems like corns, calluses and hammertoes.

With a bunion, the base of your big toe (metatarsophalangeal joint) gets larger and sticks out. The skin over it may be red and tender. Wearing any type of shoe may be painful. This joint flexes with every step you take. The bigger your bunion gets, the more it hurts to walk. Bursitis may set in. Your big toe may angle toward your second toe, or even move all the way under it. The skin on the bottom of your foot may become thicker and painful. Pressure from your big toe may force your second toe out of alignment, sometimes overlapping your third toe. An advanced bunion may make your foot look grotesque. If your bunion gets too severe, it may be difficult to walk. Your pain may become chronic and you may develop arthritis.


SO...they will take a saw and saw off the bunion part of the bone, put a pin in my big toe and straighten it then put 2 screws into the lower part of my toe bone to screw it in place...permanently...

Local anesthesia only...wish me luck and Scott and I HAPPY BIRTHDAY, ffs.

We were fortunate enough

to see some big boys today! Here is a pic that Scott took of a Bison in Yellowstone National Park.

And a trophy bull elk. You can see the snow on his antlers from rooting around in the snow.



And we were VERY VERY VERY fortunate to see the DRUID PEAK pack of wolves! There were 8 black and 8 grey wolves, chomping on a recent kill, surrounded by the ravens who were waiting for their turn at the leftovers...

Here's what the webpage said about them:

Druid Peak Pack Formed 1996 from original transplanted wolves from Canada, currently ~8 wolves. “The Druid Peak pack, perhaps Yellowstone’s most famous wolf pack, has been the subject of two feature length documentaries by National Geographic television, Wolves: A Legend Returns to Yellowstone, and Wolf Pack. For six years the pack was led by the venerable pair Wolf 21M and Wolf 42F who have become prominent figures in the history of wolf recovery in the park. After passing away in 2004, the pair left the pack to their offspring including the wander, Wolf 253M, whose trek to Utah and back has been one of the longest journeys recorded for a Yellowstone wolf, only to return to his pack of origin. Currently the pack numbers about 8 individuals.”

This is obviously an old site as the number is now 16. They were beautiful, and about 1500 yards away...lucky we were standing by the "wolf trackers" who were generous to let us look through their spotting scope. Here are a couple of pics from the web page...

Here is the alpha pair:

It was a super duper grand time!

Weekend Birthday Get-Away!

Today we are hitting the road for our little vacation. We've reserved tickets for candlelight tour of the Lewis and Clark Caverns. It is 19 miles west of Three Forks...the town where the Gallatin, Madison and Jefferson join to make the headwaters of the Missouri River.


In the mountainside, there is a cavern a mile or so into the ground. Lewis and CLark didn't discover it, it was found by the railroad workers. The State, however, made it into a park and tours go through it. The natural formations from the stallactites and stallactmites (however you spell them) are super duper cool.

At Christmas and New Years, you get to carry a little candle and in the center, we'll blow them all out and experience pitch black. They are cool, not scary and it stays about 60 degrees all year long. We've been there before, and looking forward to going back!

After that, we are meeting Ellen and Derek to soak in the natural outdoor hot springs called
We'll enjoy the nice hot springs. You can see the wildlife, and enjoy the beautiful scenery. There is usually some live music...it makes a very relaxing evening.
Afterwards, we will stay in Gardner, then head to Yellowstone Park before light in the morning...to see if we can hear and/or spot a wolf...
Hope to have some interesting news when we get back!

Winter Holiday...a season for giving...music!

7th grade choir...Sang Joy to the World, Music of the Sea, La Loo La Low, March/Pat a pan, Do You Hear What I Hear ....


And the TWELVE GROOVY DAYS OF CHRISTMAS!

We enjoyed a Christmas Tree and the fire place decorations...


Kelly sang a beautiful rendition of OH HOLY NIGHT.

4 lovely voices singing JOLLY JAZZY CHRISTMAS....

because Santa and his helper still had to decorate the tree and deliver some packages and wanted to listen to a little jazz!


4 more lovely voices singing LET LOVE COME DOWN by Point of Grace.

The select 25 voices sang PERFECT CHRISTMAS NIGHT, a great Do Wop version...

Here's the 110 8th graders...They sang Windy Nights, Sleigh Ride, a great jazz verison of God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen, a gorgeous piece called Bell Carol of the Kings...combines We 3 Kings with Ukraniun Bell Carol...

and Yule be Swingin' which is a great jazz/swing piece that has a medley of HAVE A HOLLY JOLLY CHRISTMAS, LET IT SNOW, AND ROCKIN' AROUND THE CHRISTMAS TREE.

A little dancing...and prancing...and so much fun!

I told the audience that this concert was dedicated to my mother. It's my first concert without her. But it was sure nice having Scott and Michelle and Megan and Dick and Carol and Kirby and Janie sitting out there! All the kids had a wonderful concert. Now, I think I'll try to get some sleeps.

Love you all!

Not much sleep lately...

Concerts used to be a horrible stressor on me. After 14 years of directing kids...I don't get that bad (except during festival) unless I'm in a NEW place and it's the FIRST concert I've given there...all the logistics, 160 independent variables (7th and 8th grade) and I don't know what else. I know...it will be okay, but it's the FIRST time in a NEW school. It will be okay. I am going to go do the cat box, for now.

................................

Ahhhh.......

Just a little Christmas memory lane...
I think Ed is 5, the girls are probably then, 2, sitting in the living room at their Great Gramma Rubye's house. Ed has that cute angel halo on his head.

This next shot is Christmas in Rapid City at their gramma's house with their cousin Travis.

Here is a shot of Christmas in Belle Fourche when I was single and going to college. We sure loved decorating for Christmas!


Here's the first tree I had in the trailor in Hulett. Probably the girls' first Christmas which makes Ed almost 4. I vaguely remember that tree skirt. I got it at the Salvation army, it had a burn mark on it. I wished I still had it! Funny how things seem like junk then and treasures now...
The next 2 shots are from Christmas in 1988 in Eyota, Minnesota, with Sonja's mom (grandmother on their father's side).
Look at Megan's face back there, looking at her new dolly. Doesn't that just make you want to cry? It does me!
My friend, Sylvia and I stood in line for 45 minutes, watching every kid that sat on Santa's lap start screaming and bawling...including hers. But when Ed, (11 mo. old) saw him, he smiled and laughed and googled to him. I love this shot.

Nostalgic are these...yet so heart warming.


This is our tree, this year. The skirt is new, the tree is new, lots of presents, lots of things...everything I wished I could have done for my kids when they were little. I've really had to look back and say and BELIEVE that I did the best I could for what I had. I wished I could go back in time, sometimes. There are floods of memories, floods of "if only I would have..." and floods of unresolved emotions from during those times. Maybe I am feeling so nostalgic because I am just missing my mother so much right now. I remember her saying that she always thought she didn't get us very good things, and yet I remember us always having a good Christmas. She's with us in spirit and just like Lolly says, "She's our Christmas Miracle." It's not how fancy the Christmas skirt is or if it's bought at the Salvation army because that's all you could afford. It's the love behind every single gesture you put forth, whether it is realized or not. It's knowing that you did your best with what you had...and truly believing it...and continuing to do so.